Sunday Funnies...

A woman asks the pharmacist if he sells extra-large condoms.
The pharmacist replies, "Yes, would you like to buy some?"
The woman says, "No, but do you mind if I stand here and wait to see if anyone buys a box?"






A young man got a new job running the register at a store. The old store owner said he would teach him how to up-sell.

"Watch how I do it," he said to the new hire.

As a customer put a bag of grass seed on the counter, the old-timer said to him, "When you plant those seeds and the grass starts growing, you're going to need a new lawnmower to cut the grass."

"You know," said the man, "I do need a new mower. Sure, I'll take one."

After the customer left, the new kid said, "I think I see what you mean. Let me handle this next one."

A customer stepped up to the counter and set down a box of tampons. The young salesman said, "You know, you should get you a new lawnmower to go with that."

The man asked the young salesman, "What are you talking about?"

"It looks like your weekend's shot so you might as well cut the grass."






Harry and Martha drank their coffee as they listened to the morning weather report.

"There will be three to five inches of snow today. You must park your cars on the odd-numbered side of the street."

Harry got up from his coffee to move the car.

Two days later, they sat down with their cup of coffee and listened the weather forecast.

"There will be two to four inches of snow today. You must park your cars on the even-numbered side of the street."

Harry got up from his coffee to move the car.

Three days later, they tuned in to the weather report.

"There will be six to eight inches of snow today. You must park your cars on the... ." The power went off.

He said to Martha, "What am I going to do now?"

Martha said, "Just leave the car in the garage."